Thoughts to Ponder

• If you mixed vodka with orange juice and milk of magnesia, would you get a Philip's Screwdriver?
• Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
• Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
• If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
• Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
• When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
• Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
• Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with. When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
• Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?
• Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
• Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
• If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?
• Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
• "I am." is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do." is the longest sentence?
• If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboysderanged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?
• Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
• Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
• If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times,does he become disoriented?
• If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?"