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SHE WAS SO BLOND THAT...

  1. She spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said - concentrate.
  2. She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.
  3. She told me to meet her at the corner of WALK & DON'T WALK.
  4. She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
  5. She thought a quarterback was a refund.
  6. If you gave her a penny for intelligence, you would get change back.
  7. They had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade.
  8. Under education on her job application, she put Hooked on Phonics.
  9. She tripped over a cordless phone.
  10. At the bottom of the application where it says sign here she put Sagittarius.
  11. It takes her two hours to watch 60 minutes.
  12. If she spoke her mind, she would have nothing to say.
  13. She studied for a blood test and failed.
  14. She thought Boyz II Men was a daycare center.
  15. She sold the car for gas money.
  16. When she saw the NC17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends.
  17. She heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, so she moved.
  18. She thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican Phone Company.
  19. When she was on the highway going to the airport and saw a sign that said airport left, she turned around and went home.


"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."
- Mahatma Gandhi